What he says: how do u know when lesbian sex is over???
What he means: I’ve never given a woman an orgasm ever in my life
literally like. i’m not ~~~attracted to~~~ my friends but. they’re all attractive. like, wow. fuck. i am surrounded by hot people. i hope other people see how hot my friends are. i hope they see us in a group and are like “holy shit. so many hot people. hot as stars. that’s less of a clique and more of a constellation”
why do i keep laughing at the thought of female!spiderman…(spidergirl? spiderwoman?) getting caught without her mask on and the dude who catches her just goes on a rant about ‘fake geek girls’ and how ‘that costume isn’t even accurate oh my god’ and ‘comic-con was last week’
and her secret identity is saved because some dudebro in a batman t-shirt thinks he’s hot shit
Morning guys. I hope you remember today that if you slip up you can restart your day at any time. You don’t have to wait til the next day to start over. Just sit down, breathe for a few minutes, and start again.
Do you ever just meet one person
and at first it is awkward
then you start talking
and its like
“holy crap where have you been all my life”
do u ever turn the volume on your music up until u reach the perfect level of ah yes i cannot hear anything else and it feels like a big warm hug
What would happen, for instance, if suddenly, magically, men could menstruate and women could not?
The answer is clear - menstruation would become an enviable, boast-worthy, masculine event:
Men would brag about how long and how much.
Boys would mark the onset of menses, that longed-for proof of manhood, with religious ritual and stag parties.
Congress would fund a National Institute of Dysmenorrhea to help stamp out monthly discomforts.
Sanitary supplies would be federally funded and free. (Of course, some men would still pay for the prestige of commercial brands such as John Wayne Tampons, Muhammad Ali’s Rope-a-dope Pads, Joe Namath Jock Shields - “For Those Light Bachelor Days,” and Robert “Baretta” Blake Maxi-Pads.)
Military men, right-wing politicians, and religious fundamentalists would cite menstruation (“men-struation”) as proof that only men could serve in the Army (“you have to give blood to take blood”), occupy political office (“can women be aggressive without that steadfast cycle governed by the planet Mars?”), be priest and ministers (“how could a woman give her blood for our sins?”) or rabbis (“without the monthly loss of impurities, women remain unclean”).